There is a song we sing on Sunday mornings that often I just cannot bring myself to sing all the lyrics. Let me explain.
A Bible teacher once shared, "You should never do something during your worship in public (ie, raise hands, go down on knees, etc.) that you wouldn't do in your own personal time with God." That teaching has stuck with me for many years because I desire to worship God, through music, with a genuine heart and spirit. And just as I feel I shouldn't worship God differently in a public setting as I would in private, I have also felt as if I shouldn't sing lyrics that I didn't believe I could follow through with wholeheartedly. This one line in a well-know Hillsong worship song is where my dilemma began.
Jesus, I believe in You and I would go to the ends of the earth
I believe Him. I do. I believe He is the Son of God, capable of taking over my life with His resurrection power and in turn, allowing me live abundantly. Then why would I not go to the ends of the earth for Him?
Because for so long, I thought this song only applied to Missionaries and I didn't feel called to Missions, at least not the get-on-a-plane-and-go-somewhere-with-no-running-water-and-having-to-learn-another-language-missions. Please don't judge, just trying to keep it real. So, anytime we sang this song on Sunday mornings or at a commissioning service for the many Missionaries our church sends out, I just kept my lips sealed tightly, and prayed, Lord, I want to do what YOU want me to do, but just NOT that! And then one night, as a sweet friend was commissioned to travel to a far away land to serve God beyond her comfort zone, God revealed something so small but yet so profound.
Your 'ends of the earth' are not the same as someone else's 'ends of the earth'
How life changing and freeing is that? It forced me to think outside of the box and really ask, "What are MY ends of the earth?" Mmm... now this is where the transparency comes. My 'ends of the earth' have to do with me being a stay-at-home mom. GASP! Yes, I admitted it! I struggle with being at home with the biggest blessings the Lord has entrusted to me, second only to my salvation and my husband. Just typing it makes me feel so selfish. But what God has shown me over and over again is my greatest challenges required His greatest power to take over ALL of me to live out daily what He has called me to do for Him. I love my boys, so much that I never knew this kind of love existed, but mothering, being a mom, doesn't come easy to me. It just flat doesn't. I see so many around me that it is just who they are as people, naturally nuturing, and that is just amazing to me! And if I am not careful, it can cause me to get in a pit of comparison and guilt, and that is so not of God.
But as He stirred up the questions within me and urged me to walk it out with Him, He had me stumble upon this scripture:
HE IS ABLE. He is! He is able through His divine, resurrection power, to take over my heart, feelings, mouth and all and help me be the mom He wants me to be, to His great glory. Take a moment to chew on that.
And after that has sunk in, I challenge you to ask Him, "Lord, what are MY 'ends of the earth'. Is it working at loving a difficult family member or friend? Is it sticking out a job that you don't really enjoy but know it pays the bills? It is being obedient to God in an area that you are not seeing what the exact point or purpose is? It is so worth it, ask Him. Give it a shot. Give Him a chance to show you exactly how His power looks in your daily life. Here is to praying we can all sing the lyrics below, all the way through, very soon.
Overtaking my heart
You take me in
Finding peace again
Fear is lost
In all you are
And I would give the world to tell Your story
Cause I know that You've called me
I know that You've called me
I've lost myself for good within Your promise
I won't hide it
I won't hide it
Jesus, I believe in You
And I would go to the ends of the earth
To the ends of the earth
For You alone are the Son of God
And all the world will see
That You are God
You are God